8. Write a short love story.

**I've been importing in this blog all of my previous posts from my old blogs. I wanted to merge everything because I felt there is a sense of security in doing so. **This page right here was actually a blog post from my late blog, BASKET OF DREAMS, which I deleted a long time ago, but of course, I deleted the blog itself but I never deleted my writings. I love all of the masterpieces I made from the past, beautiful, ugly, good or bad writings will always be kept! And I just decided today (February 9, 2013) to publish again all of these masterpieces in one site! Dates are preserved by the way.

I'm sorry if this project for my 10 GOALS FOR 10 DAYS PROJECT is too late!!! My cursor has been blinking at this project for more than 3 days I think, and actually I don't know where to start. I never tried making stories, I really never did try. I never thought this was gonna be so hard for me!!! This is my very first little so so so short story, and I don't know if it can be counted as LOVE STORY... I hope so... Here goes:

***

He's hugging me tight, so tight I felt that I can't breathe. But, I really don't care because it gives me a soothingly squeezingly amazing feeling. My rib is not an inch away from his body, and his jaw was resting it's place on my head. I'm like a sleeping child hiding on his chest but briefly facing away to give space for a little air. I feel sleepy, but I want to feel more of the warmth. I want to savor more of the moment, I want to be familiar with his very smell, with his every gestures. I don't wanna sleep, but I feel like I'm slowly drifting away. And I was totally gone as he say, "don't worry I'll be here when you wake up.."

I stir as the sunshine showered my eyes with light, I can't see clearly but I caught a glimpse around and he's nowhere to be found. Then as I get a more lucid view of our room, I realized everything was just a castle in the air. My bubble dreams of him always feel like reality and that always break my heart.

Just for a second I'm back again from that time, that time when he said to me in a very tired manner that he can't take it anymore, that he feels exhausted and a suffocated expression runs through his face. I felt paralyzed for a sec there because never did he speak that way to me. Question came running to my head. Has he felt like this all the time? Is he just mocking all of the smiles he used to give me?

I feel like I'm in a comatose, and he started screaming and blaming everything to me. I can't respond in any way even if I tried! I felt the numbness, I can't move.  I just stared at him while he dump some of his clothes in his back pack and slam the door on his way out as if everything is happening so fast. I thought we've been okay, what's the matter with him? I thought I know him? I thought I'm so sure about this love that we have?

He left the house and I don't know what to think! Is this for real? All of those sweet romance are all for nothing? Is this for real? As if love never means anything at all? Just slamming out of the door without even trying to resolve the problem? or is it just that he's already tired and I already reached his peak?

No more movie marathon, no more wrestling, tickling, shouting to screaming until we get teary eyes, no more eating at the same plate, no more flowers every month, no more cuddling. 

There are too much memories you can't just erase or delete like that! I'm lost and I feel wasted. I am nobody. I can't understand any of what's happening now. I want more explanation. Please come back. I wanted to shout those words, but nothing is coming out of my mouth.

 I want to be dead, I tried to jump off the cliff, but as I jump there was no water and I'm still not dead. My heart is that little flower in my porch, dead. I tried to put waters on it, but it turned brown and rusty and it dried and it became dust.

I was thinking and thinking about him over and over again. He was always been so in love with me. He looks at me and grins on his own. He hugs me from my back as I'm cooking dinner, and all the sweet tasty words he would tell me just to see the smile on my face. I missed him everyday, every night, so much that it rip my lungs apart.

So how could this be? I don't know how long it has been, I'm not even sure of how many days it has been, or weeks, or is it been years?? I'm not oriented anymore of anything and I'm too afraid to take another step into the cloudy foggy world without him. I hate myself that I've became dependent on him, that I can't lead a fruitful life alone. I was suddenly crying and praying that this is not happening to me. This is all unreal.

What did I do so wrong? Did I become too pushy? I'm sorry! I would not do that again! I realized just now that all this years, he'd been giving his way and he always try to admit everything or anything as his fault. I never give in. He needs to be the humble deer because he is the guy. But I don't know, is that what he hates about me now? That I don't let him win on our arguments? That I talk too much thinking about only myself and how he should treat her girl in the right manner and respect? Is this what he wants me to think about? That this is a relationship and we should understand each other and give in for each other?

Please give me a chance. You should have told me everything and give me a chance to change and try. Let's do this again. I want to understand you, be with you. I will now always expect that there will be dull fighting moments but I won't let you reach on my hand alone ever again. We will reach at each other's hand together. Be there for me, please... come back!

I was crying and tears dripping in my face, but I suddenly heard his voice, and the sobbing stops for a while to check if I really did hear his voice. I can feel the warmth again of his cuddle and a wide fingers wiping my tears. And as I open my eyes, he was right there.. beside me saying in a startled phase, "What are you crying about? Shhh... I'm here.. I'm here..." I sigh in relief and say to myself, "Damn freaking dream."

***

PS: Pardon me for all the wrong grammars in this post....

I insist you to correct me at once.